How would you act if you are forgettable?

I have just finished reading “The Sudden Appearance of Hope” and I have many thoughts about this book. It’s been a while that a book as stirred up so much within. I figured that would be a good way to sort it out by just writing about it.
I don’t want to take away much of the storyline and I hope I’ll not spoiler anything by saying that the main character “Hope” has a condition of being forgotten after stepping out of peoples eyesight. This brings along a lot of difficulties for her to handle life in general but also stirs up thoughts about existence and behavior.

Now right here is the first question that I have had while reading this book. How would I feel when people keep forgetting me. Like for real – forgetting I exist. How complicated would life get. Imagine having dinner in a restaurant never being served. Imagine being at the doctors and no one tending to you.

The other more important questions are though: How would I act if no one remembers me?
How would I act if my actions can not be traced back to me? Of course I would like to think I am a good human. Does that mean I would only act fairly? It must be very tempting to do something and not suffer any consequences. Have an argument and say whatever you really want because the other person will not remember and things go back to the way they were. Or taking the last piece of cake everyone wants to have. Maybe spill someones coffee because that person was mean to me. It is tempting…
Also this would be the perfect cover for any spy. Imagine how many crimes could be solved. How many information gathered without killing. Or any journalist trying to uncover unfairness. One could do a lot of good too. So the question remains: What would my conscience be like? Because it could go the other way too…

I would like to think I will not harm anyone. But how much can a person take if only rejection, confusion and denial is around one? If you are lonely all the time, if there is no human connection. If your own conscience and your own believes are the sole bar for judgement. Will that judgement be fair? Will I favour certain things? Would I slowly resolve into criminal activities just because I could. I really hope I’d act the way I believe I would act. I am glad I will never be tested.

So if you asked me how I liked that book. Honestly I don’t know. It took me 5 weeks to read and had barely 500 pages. This is very long for me. I had a hard time with the writing style not because it wasn’t good – it fitted the book. But there was no flow to it. And then made it extremely difficult for me to stay focused and have (at times) a positive reading experience. However this book contains so many snippets of knowledge, thoughts, ideas and philosophical sparks that I am pretty sure I only scratched the surface. It is one of those books I believe where you’ll find a new angle every time you pick it up. So it’s already on my “read again” list. For now I’ll give it 3,5*.

If you read the book I am really interested what you have been thinking. Leave a comment here (or on Goodreads) I would love to discuss.

Happy reading

Tobia

The Comparison Trap {BlogLiebe vol2}

Do you fall into the comparison trap? I know I do. There are moments I am pretty good at not letting stuff get to me but then I do have my weak ones. The ones where I feel nothing is good enough. The ones where it feels everyone else is doing a much better job – at keeping up the blog writing, in filling up the Instagram feed, in managing life…

Recently I feel more trapped. Just for my last blogpost I spent a lot of time researching, baking, writing, taking pictures and uploading. The response is meagre… Can you relate? Those times I wonder what I do “wrong”. Why is no one interested or why does “the algorithm” banish me. I admit it feels awful. But honestly isn’t the real problem that I need the likes and comments? Isn’t it enough that I had a wonderful experience creating something, tasting some homemade fresh steaming rolls with melting butter? That I was able to spend some time doing photography that I love. That I spend a few moments remembering my honeymoon in Finland?

In those moments I need to remind myself why I actually signed up for blogging and Social Media in the first place. Do you still remember? My list looks like this:

  • connect with friends and like minded people –> like crafters
  • find inspiration. For me that is mainly artists, I love watching how they paint, what ideas they follow, what inspires them. Because that sparks my creative juices.
  • a chance to write in English

Exactly, that is it. The list is short. I didn’t sign up to stalk people. I didn’t sign up to see if my next door neighbor had a fancy living room or a messy kitchen. I don’t care what celebrity xyz is wearing. So why should it bother me now when it is plastered all over my feed because the algorithm tells me I might like it?!

I recently unfollowed a few accounts that made me cringe. I knew a few people and I still wait for them to say something but honestly my mental health is more important than keeping up appearances. I’ve done something similar in 2015 when I deleted my entire blog roll and feed reader. Not a smart move if you want to grow a following. But what does it help me if I have a ton of people around me I don’t feel connected to?

It does get a bit more complicated when you need to follow certain people to keep up with your job. I have not yet figured out how to manage that part. I need to know about certain trends and happenings. Unfortunately I am sometimes just bored or either overwhelmed. Currently I follow a lot Freelancers they all seem to have it figured out much better than I. (At least that is what it seems like.) What to do then?

I’d be interested in your thoughts. If you also like to chat about it feel free to read the other posts Bine collected in February’s thoughts on comparison – her 2019 blog series #blogliebe!

Always Sometimes Never

I know we just had a self-entered post here but this post was inspired by Lecy and I though it was fun to read. So here is my version of it. (Also might be in a hurry to go on some road tripping this was already half done. Thinking efficiently today. Please forgive.)

I always am instantly happy when I see snowflakes.
I always get freaked out when people pop their fingers. The sound just doesn’t sound right.
I always (try) to visit my grandparents grave on “Last Sunday before Advent commemorating the Dead”
I always forgive really quick. If you say you are sorry we are good.
I always love to travel and explore and see new things.

craftaliciousme seeking creative life urban Berlin streetart

I sometimes wonder what it would be like to wander this world as a man.
I sometimes get overwhelmed by too many people.
I sometimes wish I was living in a remote cabin in the countryside.
I sometimes am too curious for my own good. Then people think I am nosy.
I sometimes want to emigrate to a new country. Hot contenders are Canada, U.S.A. anything Scandinavian.

I never smoked a cigarette in my life.
I never want to experience a car accident or anyone close to me have one. Heck make that no car accidents for everyone.
I never feel good asking people for help.
I never finish all the ideas I have tumbling in my head.
I never drink plain milk.

What is something you always do? Sometimes do? Never do?

Happy Weekend,

Tobia

Ramblings from the sickbed

I have to admit I am having a hard time today to come up with a post. I planned to create some DIYs yesterday and shoot so I can share with you. But then I was knocked out by some mean food poisoning. That is no fun let me tell you. So instead I felt miserable yesterday, slept lots and today I took it slow and caught up on my latest shows I watch.

anthurien

Right now I am struggling between feeling all right for taking some me-time and feeling lazy for not toughen up and get stuff done. Does anyone else feel like that sometimes?

So here I am trying to get at least my blogpost in even though I can not tell you much right now. Well I can tell you I am thankful for hot water bottles and tons of tea. Thankful for Mr. ♥ for taking a detour late last night after work to get me watermelon in the middle of the winter. It seems like that is my comfort food when I feel sick. Do you have food that always helps?

Anyway, I really didn’t want to complain about feel bad. So on another not I have already gathered my list of Christmas cards I want to write. I think its a few more than the last years. I don’t have an idea exactly how they will look. But maybe I am using the artwork I created for the #100daysofcraftaliciousdrops. Also I am wondering why the end of the year always comes up so fast and then flies by. It’s only a 5 weeks till Christmas.

Well so much for my rambling today. Thank you for reading until now. I hope I have more to say tomorrow.

Have a good night,

Tobia

Household Chores – an Attempt at a Scheduling Plan

I am not a huge fan of housework. I can come up with many ideas what I’d rather do. Even sitting and looking out of the window sounds more fascinating than swinging a feather duster. However I have to admit that I also don’t like to living in a pig stall so I have to suck it up and get to work. For a while we had some cleaning support. It didn’t work out as I was not willing to pay for services I am not satisfied with and prices were constantly raised. Every once in a while though I hire someone because we have too much on our schedule or I just want to treat myself.

For quite some time now I was wondering if a scheduled plan will help. Here is my attempt in gathering all the household chores in one place. Also I have included all the things that easily get forgotten in every day hassle.

household chores cleaning schedule

Daily

  • Wipe kitchen counters and unload dishwasher while making coffee
  • Start dishwasher at night
  • spent 15 minutes to clean up clutter throughout apartment to make it look tidy (fold blankets on couch, put away mail, etc.)

Weekly

  • Mondays: vacuum floors (or let little robot do it) & water plants
  • During phone calls: dust, fold laundry
  • Fridays: clean bathroom & wash all towels, deep clean kitchen, clean all mirrors and glass doors

Monthly

  • 1st: Decalcify the water filter & electric kettle
  • 15th: change bedsheets
  • mop floors

Quarterly

  • Feb/May/Aug/Nov Cleaning program for washing machine
  • Feb/May/Aug/Nov Cleaning program for dish washer

Biannually

  • Wash bedding when changing winter/summer bedding
  • Apr/Oct clean windows

Annually

  • January: clean kitchen cupboards
  • November: Vacuum the couch

Now I just have to find the energy to implement it. And I probably forgot about a dozen important things – or maybe it’s a work in progress. Please share what and how often you do things. I could really use some insights on how to do it the “right way” and also sent all the motivation please.

Happy housewifeing,

Tobia