I cannot believe, that this is the elevenths time I am sitting down on my birthday morning and capture a snapshot of how I feel at the moment. It has become a cherished tradition to start my birthday.. Evaluating my feelings, thoughts and all things in between at the moment. It is a great way to look back and see how I started into another year around the sun. And to maybe see where I am not satisfied, want more, need a change.
Enjoy or feel free to skip.
.I feel:
…sore. I did jump ropes yesterday for the first time ever. You would think my legs hurt. No it’s my trapezius muscle.
.I apologize:
…for mood swings. Or I should. It is not always easy.
.I like:
…the new neighbors. I think this will be a nicer edition to the house community than the previous ones. An older couple that actually greets me even when meeting in passing on the street. Also someone to take my packages. Yeah. No more pick up 5 km away.
.I don’t like:
…that I will be in perimenopause in the foreseeable future – if I am not already there. Don’t know. Its all confusing.
.I commit:
…to running for the parish church council. I am not quite sure if I am in over my head but it’s a step out of my comfort zone and usually some interesting things happen then.
.I explore:
…the woods with my bike and finding new paths and meadows. I saw a wild pheasant the other day. My first ever. Wild one that is.
.I watch:
…Will Trent – ok but better cop shows are out there. White Lotus season 3 – not as great as the others. Creative Life a Workshop by Mel Robbins on Self Doubt and Confidence.
.I listen:
…to podcasts: The Girl Next Door, Wahrhaftig & Vehement, What the Social, Tech Weekly, Heybooklovers.
.I crave:
…cake. And chocolate. And ice cream now that we had into summer. But I am trying daily to reduce the sugar intake and only eat those things on weekends. It’s going… well, lots of improvement possible.
.I need:
…a technology allowing me to be beamed to see my oversea friends (yes, you too!) and hug them, hang out and be with them when life is joyful or tough.
.I’m annoyed by:
…my procrastination.
.I pray:
…for my family to stay safe and healthy.
.I want:
…my rent to be lowered. The exact same apartment next door was just rented for 400€ less per month. I need to call the landlord and at least ask what is possible. Not sure how he will react so I am procrastinating.
.I hear:
…birds chirping. Tapping on my keyboard. The water kettle being done. The husband’s alarm clock. The garbage truck.
.I’m making:
…birthday nails later this morning. Otherwise my making sessions are rare. The 100 day project is not going this year. And I want to get back in the habit of daily art journaling.
.I eat:
…more protein. Or at least I am working on it. It is not easy and I am struggling.
.I drink:
…black coffee. A habit I have developed over the last year or so. Due to intermediate fasting.
.I gather:
…paper scraps. Base material for my post cards for the 100 day project (that I am failing).
.I smell:
…my Jasmin green tea I am sipping. The dewy morning air. The musty odor of the moor across the street.
.I miss:
…the fitness and shape of my 18 year old. The energy of my 20 year old. The confidence of my 25 year old.
.I don’t miss:
…the insecurities and mental instability of my 30 year old.
.I regret:
…not traveling as much as I want to.
.I research:
…all things Arctic: tips, tricks, life, books, podcasts, behavior, survival. With Chat GPT mainly.
.I dance:
…in a Zumba class. I have only been once. Tomorrow I’ll go again. I like the music. Right now its not really fun as I am no good in getting the choreography.
.I enjoy:
…the early morning sunshine. The rays when they are slowly coming above the tree line and hitting my face while I sip a hot tea or coffee.
.I appreciate:
…the life I have. The husband. My family. The possibilities. The freedom. The safety.
.I trust.
…Chat GPT as my personal trainer. It is going pretty good so far in my experiment.
.I dream:
…of the arctic and that my planned adventure will happen. I am working hard towards that dream.
.I ponder:
…how to move forward in my business. Will I shift from operational projects more towards strategic ones? Do I want to?
.I hope:
…for less egocentric, narcissistic men to run the world.
.I must:
…get some things off of my to-do list. Mainly thinking about updating the church website.
.I read:
…only one book currently “Wir sind doch Schwestern” (We are sisters after all) by Anne Gesthuysen. Not sure yet. I like the story. The writing is a bit boring though. 84 pages in.
.I write:
…social media copy. Chat GPT prompts. Blog posts. Post cards.
.I am proud:
…of sitting down and writing a testament, living will and health care proxy. Tough work but it’s off the table for now. Very proud. So much adulting.
.I emoji:
…☺️😬😓🫣🎉🤍
.I plan:
…our White Summer Party next months. Lots of little home projects. The menu. The decoration.
.I celebrate:
…with my friend for brunch. With myself in an art exhibition. With my husband and parents at dinner.
.I elevate
….myself by putting my health and fitness as a priority.
.I give:
…my opinion. Sometimes without people wanting to?! It’s a struggle. But then it’s necessary at times. And then at times where its mandatory I don’t.
.I send:
…more postcards and letters this year. Loving it as it means I also receive some fun mail.
.I take:
…too many books from the little free library.
.I see:
…my balcony garden struggling this year. Maybe I cut down the plants too early and they suffered from frost or I have neglected watering. Not sure but they are not as far as last year.
.I try:
…to become a better human being.
.I wear:
…hopefully white today. I have this outfit in mind but it might be too summery. And I am not sure it will really fit. But it’s gonna be a white paperbag pant (ankle free), a silvery satin sleeveless top. Probably light blue ballerinas. And I am thinking about topping it with my cashmere wedding cardigan in light grey. Not sure that outfit would survive the day though. And it is supposed to rain.
.I dislike:
…that I am developing an allergy as it seems like. Who needs that. Go away.
.I wish:
…my husband would get a break with the financial struggles his company is going through. Its a cycle and happens every year it feels like.
And just like that another year in the books. If you enjoyed this post you may also like a look in my previous birthday wrap ups 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2024. I’ll read last year’s now.
Now let me know one thing you wish for, that you are proud off or that you recently committed to. Is any of my answer the same as yours? Do you sometimes sit down to take a snapshot of your moment in life?
6 comments
Happy birthday, dear Tobia! I wish you so many wonderful things! I enjoyed reading this post full of your very honest and open thoughts about another year in your life. How great that you’ve done it for eleven years and can look back at your answers. I’ve never done anything like that on my birthday.
Thank you for your wishes, Michelle.
I am not even sure how this started. I may not have always done it on the exact birthday but always around. In recent years I have however sat down on birthday mornings and it’s a really nice practice.
Try it. Doesn’t have to be a birthday. Could be New Year’s Eve or any kinda day.
“I hope:
…for less egocentric, narcissistic men to run the world. ” … me too!
Happy birthday Tobia! Yay for friendly neighbours. You have so many exciting things to look forward to: the trip, your new volunteer role, the party. I look forward to traveling along with you in the coming year. One thing I recently committed to is going to the next music practice and see if I could help out on the keyboards. I haven’t played piano or organ for many years, but they are struggling with a lack of keyboard players. We will see how it goes. Luckily I am just down the road from church and can easily wander up to have a practice if I need to. Up until now I have kept the fact that I play a secret but G kept kicking me under the table at our meeting last night so I had to own up.
Well, sometimes you need that literal push to step out of the comfort zone. I am sure it’s a bit inconvenient and maybe you feel like you are not good enough/need more practice but it’s gonna be appreciated and probably be fun. So congrats for doing that.
I do have lots of excitement coming up. This summer seems to be the party summer. It’s crazy.
Thank you for the birthday wishes.
Happy birthday Tobia! What a great way to commemorate your life right now, a little snapshot of thoughts and ambitions at this moment. I like it.
Wishing you a great rest of the month, with some creative play time thrown in.
I appreciate your thoughts and wishes.
It’s really been a nice practice to do on my birthday. I need to make sure I schedule some creative play. I miss it.